How to Make New Friends

Everyone wants to have friends and be liked by others. Studies have shown that having quality friendships can enrich our lives and have a major impact on overall health and wellbeing. We all know that friendships are beneficial, but it can be difficult to try and develop new friendships.

I know for myself, I spent many years struggling with friendships. It seemed like making new friends was awkward and I never felt like people really liked me. The past few years, I have spent time figuring out how to make and keep new friends and in the process, my life has been made richer by these incredible women.

In today’s article I would like to share with you 5 tips for making new friends!

1.) Get comfortable with being uncomfortable: Its inevitable. When you are making new friendships, there are going to be some uncomfortable moments. Its awkward at first to put yourself out there and meet someone knew. I remember the first time my husband and I were on a date. There was nervous laughter, a few awkward silences, and a couple uncomfortable moments. Comfort in a relationship takes time to build. If you are always afraid of being uncomfortable, then you may miss out on some awesome friendships that are just on the other side of a little awkwardness!

2.) Be interested, not interesting: I get it, its second nature. We all want to talk about ourselves, and often when we are in a new relationship, taking about ourselves helps us feel like we are filling time. If you really want to make a new friend, think differently. Let the other person talk about herself and take an interest in her life. People want to be friends with someone who takes an interest in them. You don’t have to focus your energy on being interesting to the other person. You will naturally appeal to her if you show attention to her.

3.) Arm yourself with questions: This goes along with the last point. If you want to show interest in someone’s life, how do you do it? You ask good questions, but those questions can be difficult to think of in the moment. If you go into a get together armed with questions aimed at getting someone talking, the conversation will flow much more naturally. Some good questions to start with include: What do you like/dislike about your job? Where did you grow up? What are your hobbies? What do you like about them?

4.) Compliment, compliment, compliment: Nobody likes to be around negativity. Find something to compliment her about. Even if its just a simple thing like the color of her top or that her makeup looks pretty. People want to be friends with someone who makes them feel good about themselves. Noticing things and offering compliments makes people want to be friends with you!

5.) Treat others the way you would want to be treated: Its the golden rule and it applies to making friends. If someone were to want to become your friend today, how would you want them to approach you? How would you want them to talk to you? Would you want them to invite you and include you? Be the kind of friend to others that you’d want them to be to you and watch it come back to you tenfold.

So those are my five tips. I would love to hear your best advice for making new friends! Anything you’d add to this list or change? Comment below!

Sarah Hendrickson

Sarah is a wife to a hot police man, mom to 3 (soon to be 4) daughters, birth doula, sometimes student, and professional cookie dough eater. She Instagrams and hashtags the crazy sorority that is her home over @Sarahvonawesome.

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